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Yes, but…

A linguistic element commonly used in casual conversations, however, less useful in Coaching.  Used at the beginning of a sentence, “yes, but” expresses seeming consent with the Coachee ’s statement, while in the second part presents a different  point of view.  Most often this has a negative effect on the coach-client relationship.

Using “but” just on its own may sometimes be useful during a coaching session.  Attention must be paid though to the type of sentence placed before and after “but”.  The following order is reinforcing to The client: -, but, +.  The other way: +, but, – is usually perceived a weakening.

Examples:

+, but, –

You have written a very good report but you were late with handing it in

-, but, +

You have handed in the report late, but it was very good.

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